The Meaning of Life with Dr. Bob

It was a classic case of religion running up against spirituality. Sandy had made an appointment with me to do some counseling, she said. I had known her several years by that point as she was a regular at the fellowship community I headed.

Sandy had light brown hair, a pleasant and ready smile. She was dressed casually when she arrive for the appointment. She wore brown penny loafers, with a bright penny in each, something I had not seen in decades.

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“How’s it going with you, Sandy?” I asked.

“Not bad,” she said. “But I am frustrated with all the rules and doctrines my husband’s religion seems to impose. It spills over into my life and I don’t like it.”

My ears pricked up. “What sort of rules and doctrines are bothering you?”

“Wearing only skirts or dresses to worship. Must be there every Sunday. Give at least ten percent of our incomes to that church. Must believe exactly as told or be ostracized. Consult with the pastor before we can leave town on a weekend – sort of ask his permission to be away. I am just fed up.”

“You have just encountered the difference between religion and spirituality, I suspect, Sandy. Are you fed up with the rigidity?” I asked.

“I think that’s exactly it,” said Sandy. “Where is the freedom to be me? I don’t run into these problems here in your fellowship. What’s the difference between spirituality and religion, then?”

“Religion is where you must adhere to certain prescribed beliefs and practices in order to be accepted in that group. But spirituality is where you follow your heart in regard to worship, practice and lifestyle.”

“I don’t want to be restricted anymore. I want to be free to believe and think as I see fit. I don’t want rituals shoved down my throat anymore.”

I could see this might be a problem in their marriage if her husband and Sandy developed irreconcilable differences over the beliefs and practices they followed in their believing life.

“How does your husband feel about your point of view?” I asked.

“I think he sees my restlessness under the watchful eye of his congregation and pastor. I think he will not stand in my way of change. He’s pretty easy going.”

I was not convinced this would not cause marital difficulties in their future. But there was little I could do, or ought to do now, as this was not Sandy’s presenting challenge.

“Then you need to follow your heart and develop your own way of seeing God and the values you may find from that belief system. Spirituality is about discovering for yourself that Spirit is a prime element in life. But how you view that Spirit is determined by you through study and practice. Are you prepared to do that?”

“You mean I’m free to believe and think as I wish? I don’t have to believe in a certain way to have a believing life?”

“Exactly,” I said.

“That is a real relief. How do I start?” Sandy asked.

“I think you need to develop a way of meditating to move closer to the Divine in your life. You need to go to a bookstore and look over the titles in meditation and discover for yourself what you might find as a fit for you.”

“You are not going to suggest a book for me?”

“No. I think you need to get right into deciding for yourself a way of thinking and believing that is best for you. Perhaps a book title will jump out at you at the bookstore. When the student is ready, the teacher appears.”

Sandy left the office that day in brighter spirits than when she first arrived. I saw her many times in the fellowship I lead and she appeared well. It even seemed that her husband had come around to her way of thinking. After some time, he did not return to his former church.

It is for you to decide what you want to be as well. You can be a religionist adhering to strict rules and dogmas. Or you can be a spiritualist and make your own way. There is plenty of help in either direction.

Choose today and begin.

This has been Dr. Bob 4 U, and I invite you to change your life for the better by claiming your Free Instant Access to a Force-Source-Resource including a monthly newsletter titled The Force-Source-Resource Newsletter. Just Click Here. Remember, one bit of information can give you a lifetime of satisfaction.

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You know the saying, “I wish I had a dollar for every . . . .” I lost count early in my full time life coaching career (clergy) of the number of times people came to me and told me of their childhood in church. How they were scared to death over what was described to them as Hell. How if they did not conform to the teachings of that particular religion, that’s where they would spend eternity. I just got a Facebook the other day about how a woman’s child was fussing in worship service. A man sitting nearby took the child from the woman and began spanking him. Wow!

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httpvh://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_hmbswWz1uY

Yet, some religious organizations are complaining about the increased secularization of society. That means that people are turning away from the religious organizations and trying to run their own lives. I say hurray! I say this, hurray, from one who spent his entire adult life, from age 18 until retirement at 61, being responsible to see that folks knew and followed what my religious organization taught. I still remember the day when a woman come to me after a worship service of that organization and said, “You got to tell me what to do. I’ve always relied on the church to do that.” I told her I would not do that. But I could help her find her own way. She was visibly upset with my reply. Shortly, she left the particular religious organization I served.

My point is this: it is time for all humans to begin to make up their own minds. I know that some do not want to do that. Many, maybe even a majority, still want someone else to tell them what to do. I believe people need to decide for themselves.

If people do this, some will say, there will be religious anarchy. There is now. Some will say that people won’t behave if there are no threats of hell. (Threats of hell were deliberately used over the centuries to have people be kept in line.) We have got to come into a new age where people decide for themselves to behave, whatever that means, because it is the best for them to do for themselves. I behave well because that will get me the best for myself.

When you have found happiness within by being in contact with the Supreme Consciousness of the Universe, which is the meaning of life, you will, naturally, want to fulfill that happiness in the world. Find you bliss within and beam that bliss into the world. What do you think would happen if everyone started trying to do this? I think that peace would break out on the earth. I think that sanity would break out on the earth. I think that conservation of all species on this planet would break out. I think that we would have a far, far better chance of surviving the next 100 years as the species we name human.

So, I say, hurray! For the great secularization of society. Let people choose for themselves as they are taught the consequences of their own actions. Let us drift away from religions that tell us we have to do it this way or go to hell. Nonsense. Let us drift toward ideas that teach us we are responsible for our own actions and their consequences. But this is not new with me. Such has been taught and demonstrated for thousands of years.

And I invite you to know a lot more about being responsible for yourself. Sign up for Free Instant Access to some of my Force-Source-Resources. Pick out the one that says Two Life Phrases for Self Development – “I Am My True Self” and “I Am Conscious” or any or all of the other freebies. Remember, one bit of information can give you a lifetime of actualization.  Just click here and you’ll be on your way. I believe these resources will change your life.