Posts Tagged ‘happiness’

The Meaning of Life, To Be Happy, and the Whole of Life and Where You Fit In

Sunday, August 15th, 2010

In the meaning of life, as I define it, to be happy, there is the place where you fit into life. Not knowing this is sad. In such a mood as that Gerry came through the door of my office. Shoulders drooping, countenance ashen, she eased herself into the chair as if she were positive that if she moved “wrong” she would cause herself great pain.

The complete text of this blog continues after the YouTube pane.


I asked her how she was doing. “That’s just it, Dr. Bob. I just came from a weekend with my in-laws and I feel ridiculous. Where do I fit in?” She told me of how they, the in-laws, seemed to exclude her. How, at first, it seemed like her imagination. But no, as the weekend wore on, she realized they were deliberately being rude and belittling. She said she tried to understand why this was happening. Gerry said she always had problems with feeling like she did not fit. At first thought it was her own emotional tone that made her feel as she had that weekend. However, the more aware she became of her own feelings, the more she realized it was not all her.

Here was an authentic life challenge for Gerry for two reasons. One, she understood that because of her own feelings, actions and words by others could set off her own negative opinions of herself. Two, actions and words by others can be designed by them to maneuver a person in the direction of being an outcast. Both are real challenges, one coming from a person’s interior life and the other from exterior life.

What to do? How to help Gerry see that she fit no matter what was happening outside herself? And quickly done too. She appeared desperate.

“Gerry, do you understand the idea of ‘Universe’? That there is the whole, the entirety of creation?”

She allowed that she thought so. I asked if she believed she was a part of this whole.

“Well, yes, if I am in the Universe, then I must be part of it. What’s the point, Dr. Bob?”

“The point is that if you are part of this entirety we name the Universe, if you were missing from it, would it be the same?”

“Of course not,” she replied. I avow to you that at that precise moment, as she finished her reply, the color began to return to her face. She then made the intuitive leap. “I am part of the Universe, so … I fit no matter what.”

Here is where I needed to let her be in her thoughts and not interject more than was necessary. Sometimes doing that, interjecting more information than is needed, just gums up the works.

With a smile, Gerry said, “I never thought of it that way. Is it that simple? Yes, it is. And no one can ever take my place.” Her physical expression going out of the office was the complete opposite, I would say, of her way of moving when she first came in.

You must to understand that your life is a needed and integral part of the Universe in which you live. Your place can only be taken by you. No one can replace you or what you represent to the Universe. You often cannot easily see this. But it is there and part of the meaning of life. In that meaning, obviously, when you feel you fit, you will know happiness.

And I invite you to know a lot more about how you fit. Sign up for Free Instant Access to some of my Force-Source-Resources. Pick out the one that says Two Life Phrases for Self Development – “I Am My True Self” and “I Am Conscious” or any or all of the other freebies. Remember, one bit of information can give you a lifetime of self actualization.Just click here and you’ll be on your way. I believe these resources will change your life.

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The Meaning of Life, To Be Happy, and The Growing Secularization of Society 89

Tuesday, March 30th, 2010

You know the saying, “I wish I had a dollar for every . . . .” I lost count early in my full time life coaching career (clergy) of the number of times people came to me and told me of their childhood in church. How they were scared to death over what was described to them as Hell. How if they did not conform to the teachings of that particular religion, that’s where they would spend eternity. I just got a Facebook the other day about how a woman’s child was fussing in worship service. A man sitting nearby took the child from the woman and began spanking him. Wow!

More text after this video pane.

Yet, some religious organizations are complaining about the increased secularization of society. That means that people are turning away from the religious organizations and trying to run their own lives. I say hurray! I say this, hurray, from one who spent his entire adult life, from age 18 until retirement at 61, being responsible to see that folks knew and followed what my religious organization taught. I still remember the day when a woman come to me after a worship service of that organization and said, “You got to tell me what to do. I’ve always relied on the church to do that.” I told her I would not do that. But I could help her find her own way. She was visibly upset with my reply. Shortly, she left the particular religious organization I served.

My point is this: it is time for all humans to begin to make up their own minds. I know that some do not want to do that. Many, maybe even a majority, still want someone else to tell them what to do. I believe people need to decide for themselves.

If people do this, some will say, there will be religious anarchy. There is now. Some will say that people won’t behave if there are no threats of hell. (Threats of hell were deliberately used over the centuries to have people be kept in line.) We have got to come into a new age where people decide for themselves to behave, whatever that means, because it is the best for them to do for themselves. I behave well because that will get me the best for myself.

When you have found happiness within by being in contact with the Supreme Consciousness of the Universe, which is the meaning of life, you will, naturally, want to fulfill that happiness in the world. Find you bliss within and beam that bliss into the world. What do you think would happen if everyone started trying to do this? I think that peace would break out on the earth. I think that sanity would break out on the earth. I think that conservation of all species on this planet would break out. I think that we would have a far, far better chance of surviving the next 100 years as the species we name human.

So, I say, hurray! For the great secularization of society. Let people choose for themselves as they are taught the consequences of their own actions. Let us drift away from religions that tell us we have to do it this way or go to hell. Nonsense. Let us drift toward ideas that teach us we are responsible for our own actions and their consequences. But this is not new with me. Such has been taught and demonstrated for thousands of years.

And I invite you to know a lot more about being responsible for yourself. Sign up for Free Instant Access to some of my Force-Source-Resources. Pick out the one that says Two Life Phrases for Self Development – “I Am My True Self” and “I Am Conscious” or any or all of the other freebies. Remember, one bit of information can give you a lifetime of actualizationJust click here and you’ll be on your way. I believe these resources will change your life.

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The Meaning of Life, To Be Happy, and Your Entire Life Is in This Moment 87

Saturday, March 27th, 2010

The meaning of life, to be happy, means I need to be conscious of this next step I am taking.

Here is the video of this blog. If you prefer just text, please see the ideas just below the video pane. I start over with the text for convenience sake.

The meaning of life, to be happy, means I need to be conscious of this next step I am taking. One of the most difficult mental and spiritual activities I undertake is living in this moment. I know from years of study and more years of experience that this is the only moment I have. My entire life’s journey is contained in the step I take in this, the here and now. Every choice I made, every decision I accepted, culminates in this instant.

So I need to be taking as correct a step as I can. The only way to do that is to be conscious of what I am doing, saying, thinking in this moment. In the process that we call living, each activity I have done in the past leads to this moment. Every possible step I can take in the next moment is a collaboration of all that has occurred in my life from the past. But, neither the past nor the future exist for me in this moment, in this step.

It does not mean I am cut off from the flow of time. It means I have another example of the non-existence of time. For I am free to choose, in this moment, what I will do, given what I have done. Confusing? You bet.

Let’s try this: The past is gone as we measure time. The future has not yet come, as we measure time. What’s left? Of course, this moment. Only. So, everything I am or hope to be is contained here and now, only. Mentally you can see this as someone taking a strip of paper and cutting out a central section of it and discarding the two ends. What is left is now.

Therefore, you are unencumbered by the past, just as the piece of the strip of paper that represents the past is discarded. Similarly, you are unencumbered by the future; that piece of paper is gone as well. So, you make of what is left, this moment, just what you will. You can make it happy. You can make it meaningful. As long as you are conscious of what you are doing. You become conscious of what you are doing instantly by placing your attention on this moment only.

Yes, this is a tough concept to get your mind around. Yet it is so simple. Live in this moment. It is the only moment you have. Make it meaningful. Make it happy. Because you are unencumbered by past or future, you are totally free to make it whatever you want it to be. No matter what is happening in your world, you make this next step your entire life. For it is. And that is one of the insights into the meaning of life, to be happy.

And I invite you to know a lot more about you and your happiness. Sign up for Free Instant Access to some of my Force-Source-Resources. Pick out the one that says Two Life Phrases for Self Development – “I Am My True Self” and “I Am Conscious” or any or all of the other freebies. Remember, one bit of information can give you a lifetime of actualization. Just click here and you’ll be on your way. These resources will change your life.

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