“They are just so radical,” said Olivia. She was slim and trim with a heathy tan and a pink scarf around her neck. “My daughter and her friends with their Goth look and piercings.”

“How old is Cyndi now?” I asked.

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“She is twenty-two and still dresses that way. I just can’t stand it. I’m at the point of saying she can’t come around anymore to negatively influence her younger sister and brother.”

Olivia had developed a red hue in her cheeks as she spoke with vehemence. It was obvious she was unhappy. I knew it was her judgments that were making her so.

“Cyndi is old enough to make up her own mind,” I said. “You are adding value judgments that affect you, but not her. It is you who are making you miserable.”

“What?” Olivia exploded. “What do you mean it is me who is making me miserable?”

“Suppose you did not know about the look and the piercings. Imagine that for a moment. Truly let go of your vision of your daughter dressed in her garb. What do you see?”

Composure was a few seconds coming. Olivia actually closed her eyes without prompting from me.

“I see her as she was when she was twelve, dressed in her Sunday best. She is so innocent and lovely.”

Then Olivia’s face darkened. Gone was the red blush replaced by storm clouds. “Oh, I see,” she said. “When I attach my feelings to her present way of dressing, then I get angry. I see what she was and who she has become – in my mind. Then I am unhappy”

“You need to give up your judgments,” I said. “When you make judgments about anything or anyone you are leading yourself down the path of unhappiness.”

I told Olivia, now that she was ready, that things, or people for that matter, are neither good nor bad – but we make them so. With our judgments we add good or bad to things.

We parted then. Olivia seemed in better spirits.

When you bring an end to judgment, you bring an end to negativity (positivity as well). When you accept people and things just as they are, you relieve yourself of the need for carrying opinion.

When you stop dumping assessment on everything, you are making the environment for happiness much more solid. You are the one who gives value to anything and anyone.

Another facet to this jewel of non-judgment is gratitude. Replace appraisal with grace. That is a true and lasting path to contentment.

Try this. Take any idea, person, happening, opinion. Detach yourself from it. First, and immediately, that will ease any tension you have around it. The happening or person is not you.

Second, you will see, also immediately, that it is just as it is. You add value to make it good or bad in your eyes.

Third, you will discover that you have a far greater feeling of contentment when you do not multiply it with judgment.

So, bring an end to judgment. Let be. Begin now. You will feel the better for it, beginning – now.

This has been Dr. Bob 4 U, and I invite you to change your life for the better by claiming your Free Instant Access to a Force-Source-Resource including a monthly newsletter titled The Force-Source-Resource Newsletter. Just Click Here. Remember, one bit of information can give you a lifetime of satisfaction.

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Further, karma is not punishment for something you have done or not done. You must see this. It is simply the effects of one’s actions. When something bad happens to you, it may be, I repeat, may be caused by something you did. But it is in no way punishment. Nor is it, then, reward for something you have done right. It is like blowing out the flame on a burning candle. You blow air out your lungs toward the flame and if the air volume is sufficient and forceful enough, the flame is extinguished.

That does not mean, however, that someone else cannot inflict pain upon you. Because that pain is inflicted does not necessarily mean you have done anything wrong. People are free. They will do what they want. Sometimes people do bad things. The hurt you feel from such events may not have been caused by what you did or did not do.

So, you have got to live with the consequences, effects, of what you do or say. That’s karma. But when you feel hurt it does not mean, absolutely, you have done anything to deserve that pain.

There are those who say that the effects of what we do can be carried over several or many lifetimes to be worked out. In other words, one could have done something so heinous in another life that the effects of that act are still being worked out in this life. And maybe it takes more than one lifetime to work them through.

What I say is this: You deserve the best. You are a child of The Creative Spirit; you are spirit yourself. As such all the best is yours, as long as you don’t stand in the way of it. When pain comes your way, as it does for all of us, you haven’t inescapably done something to cause it. Yes, it could be the working out of the effects of some past behavior of yours. Or, it could be that some free human being has caused this pain.

Don’t automatically assume you deserve hurt. DO assume the you deserve the best. The effects of your actions will work themselves out. But the affliction you feel at any moment is not inescapably of your doing.

The meaning of life, to be happy, has to do with accepting that you deserve the very best. Which you do. Believe it. Live it.

And I invite you to pick up more info about deservedness. Sign up for Free Instant Access to some of my Force-Source-Resources. Pick out the one that says “All The Best – You Deserve It,” or any or all of the other freebies. Remember, one bit of information can give you a superior point of activation. Just click here and you’ll be on your way. These resources will change your life.

There are events and circumstances in life that we regard as good or evil. Many philosophers and gurus want us to consider all events as neither good nor bad. They insist that all events are neutral and we give them their connotation.

But, I think, for the average person this is a difficult task. When one is caught in the throws of what most everyone would call evil, persons cringe. In other words, how to help these folks as they are on their way to enlightenment. We are not all at the same level of insight.

As we work our way deeper into the Core of our beings, the Center where all is calm, how shall we deal with evil? Good, of course, is simply accepted and rejoiced in. But what of evil? Here is an answer.

In a Universe that is free, what some call bad things will happen. What some people call bad people will happen. Events or people choose to think that they must do what others call evil. Greatest example, perhaps: Adolf Hitler. He developed a plan to make certain persons superior to all others. He evolved a design that would eliminate those he saw as a problem. The point is, he believed he was correct. He found people who agreed with him. They set the plans in motion. At first he couldn’t be stopped.

It’s not that the Universe turned a blind-eye, by the way. There is operative in the Universe a mechanism called Karma. Karma basically means that what one does sets up a momentum that will flow back upon you. This is called, sometimes, “consequences.” Whatever one does, there are consequences.

When something bad is happening in your life, as you see it, that’s the very time you need to consider karma for both yourself and everyone and everything involved in the event. The first thing you need to realize is that there will be consequences for whoever perpetrated this negative upon you.

Then you need to try to make sure you do not retaliate in kind. You want your karma to be good. Defend yourself, for sure. Protect your life and property, if need be. Protect the lives of your loved ones, absolutely. But do not be the cause of evil yourself. (Defending your life, even if it results in the death of the one attacking you, is not evil, in my view.)

Deal with evil in the best way you can. Try to preserve your own good karma. (For some this answer will seem very simplistic. Not enough meat on the bones. That may well be true, but not everyone is at the same level of grace.) Small steps first. Till that day when you can see all events as neutral and you know yourself free to choose how to label them.

When you uphold your own good karma, you are reaffirming the meaning of life, which is to be happy.

And I invite you to pick up more info about happiness in your life. I ask to you sign up for Free Instant Access to some of my Force-Source-Resources. One of which is titled, “How to Use the Spiritual Circuit to Be a Good Person.” Remember, one bit of information can give you a superior point of activation. Just click here and you’ll be on your way. These resources will change your life. (Or, if it appears there, please sign up now in the upper right hand corner.)