The Meaning of Life with Dr. Bob

Some time back a blog-reader expressed a concern about forgiveness. I replied to her that she needed to forgive but she did not need to forget. She replied in turn that she could not forgive because the damage was just too great.

I cannot imagine all the hurt that has come into someone’s life. I know it is sometimes even beyond my imagining. I know, also, that unless you can come to forgive, the one who caused the hurt is still in control of your life.

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Which means they are still in control of your happiness. Forgiveness favors you and your meaning and happiness.

Forgiveness allows you to set aside the hurt. I realize that the wounds can be so painful that you do not wish to let go. That’s where the problem enters.

When you cannot let go, your life is so attached that it is affected by that appendage. It would be like having a 50 pound weight duct-taped to your back. Everything you do will be impacted by the load.

Soon the burden, being so persistent and constant, would touch your mental and spiritual states. It would literally weigh you down.

How can you find the ability to forgive? Mind you, I am not taking your situation and the hurt done to you lightly. But if you want to forgive so YOU can get on with your life, how do you find it?

You discover it by going inside of yourself. I know – easy for me to say, but not so easy to do. Let us try together.

The seat of your life’s meaning and the happiness derived therefrom begins in your interior or spiritual life. You find the meaning of your life, which is to be happy, at the center of your being. There you make and keep contact with the Conscious Cosmos.

You find there in that connection that you are loved and accepted just as you are. No strings. No hidden agendas.

In other words, you are totally forgiven yourself. As a matter of fact, you are totally accepted no matter what you may do or not do. If you will, you can see it this way: You are totally forgiven even before you do or do not do anything.

(I know. That is not an easy concept to grasp.)

That does not mean that you can get away with anything. There is the idea of karma. Karma means that whatever you do, there will be a reaction. Do something good and good will come to you. Do something not so good and something not so good will come your way. This is not punishment, it is cause and effect.

So, while you are forgiven, there will be a reaction. Just so with the person who has hurt you. Their actions will cause reactions. This will get them their just compensation. What will come to them is in the hands of the Universe and or in the arena of the social justice system.

This takes vengeance out of your hands. Vengeance is subject to the law of karma as well. Allow the Conscious Cosmos to recompense the one who delivered the pain.

No matter what has happened to you, you can forgive because it does you the most good. And because whatever retribution is coming to the perpetrator is in another’s hands.

You keep your meaning, purpose and happiness intact. You release yourself from the hold non-forgiveness puts you in. It is self-inflicted slavery.

Therefore, find your connection to the Conscious Cosmos. Know that you are forgiven. Understand that karma is real and will affect the one who caused you pain.

When you have discovered these realities you have regained control of your own live. Forgive today.

This has been Dr. Bob 4 U, and I invite you to change your life for the better by claiming your Free Instant Access to a Force-Source-Resource including a monthly newsletter titled The Force-Source-Resource Newsletter. Just Click Here. Remember, one bit of information can give you a lifetime of satisfaction.

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Once again a great question concerning the meaning of life has come from one of our readers. The person asked: “Do I deserve to be forgiven for drug addiction that greatly hurt my parents?” My immediate and unqualified answer was, “Yes.”

Everyone deserves forgiveness. Why? Because everyone has made mistakes. Some mistakes are hurtful. Some not so much. None of us is perfect. We all need to be forgiven and deserve to be forgiven. If someone were perfect, never having made a mistake, never said or done something stupid, then perhaps that someone could pass judgment on another. However, even God, whom many people feel is Perfection, forgives. That is to say, from my perspective, what I know of as God is completely accepting. Forgiveness is a given in God’s life, both literally and figuratively.

I have come to know I deserve forgiveness for this reason. God accepts me as I am. This is the reason everyone else deserves forgiveness as well. God accepts you just as you are.

Forgiveness, then, works for the forgiven. Obviously, the burden of shame and guilt can be lifted from the shoulders of the person who has said or done something that was hurtful. (And believe me when I say that I know it is not always easy to forgive. Some things are done or said that cause irrevocable harm.) When a person apologizes for what was said or done, tries to make amends, attempts to never do it again, then forgiveness offers a way to recover the natural dignity that belongs to the offender. (This does not necessarily mean that punishment should not be meted out.)

Nor does it mean that the offense should be forgotten. To forget about something that could cause you harm again; it is a fool’s way to live. When forgiveness is given, then every attempt ought to be made to move on as if the offense is forgotten.

People often forget, however, what forgiveness does for the forgiver. It most definitely lightens his or her load as well. To bear a grudge, to carry around a grievance weighs down the soul. It literally puts up a blockage which restricts the free flow of God’s love. Now, I did not say that God stops loving. I said the flow of that love is restrained. The person doing the restraining is the non-forgiver. It’s like a blight upon the soul. It will actually eat away at the soul of the carrier. When the non-forgiver looks at the one who needs forgiveness, all that can be seen is that blight. This is self-inflicted misery. The wretchedness that one feels when one does not forgive is of the non-forgiving person’s own making. Spiritual homicide upon the one who need forgiveness and the one who is non-forgiving.

Thus, the person who caused hurt in their parents deserves to be forgiven for at least these two reasons; 1. All fall short of the glory of God in us; no one never makes a mistake. 2. Burdens on both sides of the forgiveness fence are lifted and cast away.

Do you know someone who needs forgiving? Try to forgive in this moment. Do it now.

Are you the one who needs forgiveness? Apologize, try to make amends, try never to commit the forgiveness-needing-act again. Do it now.

And I invite you to pick up more info about deservedness in your life. I ask to you sign up for Free Instant Access to some of my Force-Source-Resources. One of which is titled, “All the Best – You Deserve It.” Remember, one bit of information can give you a superior point of activation. Just click here and you’ll be on your way. (Or, if it appears there, please sign up now in the upper right hand corner.) These resources will change your life as you better understand the meaning of life.