The Meaning of Life with Dr. Bob

Rico came through my office door exclaiming, “What makes you so happy, Dr. Bob?” Then he sat down.

He was a little angry. I had something he wanted but couldn’t figure out how to get.

I smiled and said, “I’ve got connections.”

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Rico was in his mid-thirties. Though Rico is not his real name, he is Hispanic American. He had a good job and a very nice family. He and his family had been attending our caring community for over three years.

Rico said, “I want those same connections.” He spoke those words as if I were keeping something from him.

“Are you willing to work at them? They don’t come easy, although they are cheap.”

“You know I can work hard.”

“O.K. Here are the three of them: 1. A Connection with The Source of All There Is. 2. A connection with yourself. 3. A connection with others.”

He wasn’t expecting those. But then he leaned forward in his chair just a little, indicating his eagerness.

First, I began to explain, comes a connection with The Source of All There Is. Some call this Source God, but I often find that there is too much harmful baggage to unpack and discard with this word “God.” So I use a less familiar term – The Source of All There Is.

You get in touch with this Source through meditation or prayer. I stick closer to meditation as prayer also can have negative connotations for many folks. I told Rico he needed to develop a meditative life using one of the many forms of meditation.

What would that do for him? This connection would help him find the meaning of his life, which, I believe, is to be happy. You find happiness when you come to understand that The Source accepts you just as you are. Full acceptance and acceptance of your acceptance equals happiness.

You choose to be happy knowing you are accepted. Happiness here is defined as an excellent sense of well-being. Joy, on the other hand, is an emotion that erupts from external events. Happiness is a choice to feel a sense of well-being no matter what is happening in your external world.

This sense of well-being is developed and perpetuated through a connection with The Source of All There Is.

But you do not finished there. You go on to accept yourself just as you are. Yes, we can all improve. But we start just where we are right now. Rich or poor or in between; tall, short or medium; thin or heavy or in between; educated or not; family or single; all these, any of these is just the way you are right now. Accept that.

In other words, make a genuine affirming connection with yourself. Be aware of who you really are. As you are totally and unconditionally accepted by The Source, there is no need to look at yourself as anything else. No matter what you have done or not done, been or not been, said or not said, you affirm yourself just as you are.

Many people find themselves separated from themselves because they feel they are not as perfect as they are supposed to be. Nonsense. You are perfect just the way you are. Yes, improvements may need to be made. But as you are, right now, you are perfectly human.

These two: acceptance from The Source and affirmation of self, lead to a connection with others. Why? You need to express your acceptance and affirmation in the world around you as you interact with others.

Now that you know you are accepted by The Source and you have affirmed yourself, you can see that all others are in the same boat as you whether they realize it or not.

They need to know they are accepted by The Source. They need to know they can affirm themselves just as they are. One of the ways they can discover these is through your actions and words.

How? When you show compassion for others, you have demonstrated acceptance and affirmation. How many people need affirmation and acceptance? That’s right – everyone. You can be one of the instruments to help others. You share your happiness.

When you share it you reinforce happiness within yourself. You reinforce your connection to The Source. You reinforce your self-connection. You reinforce your connection with others as they respond positiviely to your kindness and compassion.

Rico said, “I can do that. I’ll start with the next person I meet.” We parted then but as I saw Rico frequently, he did seem much happier than before we talked together.

You can make these three connections as well. Start now.

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Snapping through my office door one morning was Abbey. Sprite that she was, she often seemed to do this. No announcement; just twinkle and she was there. She is an elf-like creature who commonly charms everyone she meets. That day, however , there was a look of deep care upon her face.

“Abbey, I can see by your face you are fretful, what’s up?” I asked.

“Is it that visible, Dr. Bob? I thought I hid it pretty well. I feel like I am about to be assaulted.”

“Assaulted?” I said in fright. “What is going on?”

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“I know that we are all connected in the Cosmic Soup we call the Universe. But sometimes it feels as though when I am connected to everyone, I am vulnerable to everyone. That anyone at any time can just overwhelm me and take from me … myself. Does that make any sense?”

“Well, it sure does, Abbey. I just never expected to hear it from you. I think you might misunderstand the connectedness we all have.”

We talked about the fact that there really is no separation between anything and anything else in the universe. We are taught, however, that we must be on our own. That we must make it by ourselves. But, really, the Universe is One, just as the term universe implies.

So all of our strengths and weaknesses are open to any who would look deeply enough. We are what we are and that is out there for all to see. It makes one feel vulnerable if misunderstood.

This is one of the paradoxes of human beings (and all else in the Universe, just less so with less conscious entities). That is, we are one so the Universe knows all our strengths and all our weak points. Because something knows all our fallible spots, we feel vulnerable to attacks there. Even beyond that, though, the Universe knows all our strengths as well.

If you feel that your strengths are not as strong as they ought to be, you can feel assailable even at those locations. You then feel caught like an open-faced sandwich, ready to be devoured.

“Well, if I misunderstand what connectedness is, Dr. Bob, explain how it actually is, please,” Abbey said.

You are connected to the Universe and all else that is in it. But it is not as if you are dangling in a strong and violent wind, likely to be struck by debris that is carried on those hostile air currents. You are protected.

First, you are protected because others have to deliberately and consciously make the connection with the Universe as you have. Most people, 99%, do not. They seem to be content to muddle along believing they are each separate from all others and all other things. (They are to be pitied in that state. In compassion we need to try, gently, to lead them to see their connectedness.)

So those folks will not see you as vulnerable. They will see you as separate and private just as they feel themselves to be.

Second, and much more importantly, the Universe does not give up its confidential knowledge casually.

“Take your own situation, Abbey. The only way I knew you were having trouble with this idea was because you came to my office and told me about it. I would never have known otherwise. In other words, you, Abbey, get to allow yourself to be vulnerable when you choose.”

“I can still be as private as I wish? But doesn’t that sort of violate the whole principle of being in connection with everything else?” Abbey asked.

“Well, no, it does not violate anything. It is your privilege, or not, to share who you are. The Universe does not force you to do so.”

“I make the determination as to when and if I want others to known who I am? I can make myself as vulnerable, or not, as I wish.”

“Yes, but the Universe still knows you fully, Abbey,” said I. “And, by the way, accepts you fully just as you are, strengths and weaknesses.”

Her face a returned to that pixie like flavor she usually wore. “I no longer feel like I am going to be attacked at any minute, Thanks, Dr. Bob.”

With that she popped back out the office door.

You are only as vulnerable as you wish to make yourself with regard to any other conscious entity. You need only remember that the Universe, the Cosmic Consciousness knows you just as you are. It will never attack you. On the contrary, it will only support you at all times.

Beginning in this moment, live your life as if you are connected to all things and people. But know also that you are only as vulnerable as you wish to be.

This has been Dr. Bob 4 U, and I invite you to change your life for the better by claiming your Free Instant Access to a Force-Source-Resource including a monthly newsletter titled The Force-Source-Resource Newsletter. Just Click Here. Remember, one bit of information can give you a lifetime of satisfaction.

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Once there was man who thought he knew the meaning of life. He wanted to be happy. He had gathered all sorts of worldly possessions. He had a great family. Many loyal friends. An excellent job. He felt fine for quite sometime with all these.

Then, he began to feel shallow. He realized he was like a cartoon character who had an outline of a body. But all anyone else could see was the white paper behind his personal frame.

When he realized this, that he was empty, it did something to him. He found he had no basis for his life: for his family, job, friends, possessions. They somehow began to turn sour for him. He acted and spoke in such ways that all could perceive his shallowness. Before this, before he left himself empty, no one else saw it. But when he felt he was a superficial character, they believed him.

So, he began looking for the meaning of his life. What he discovered over some time of meditation and thinking was that he lacked happiness on the inside. He thought family, friends, job, possessions were his happiness. He learned there was nothing wrong or bad about any of those by themselves. They just were not where happiness was.

He discovered the meaning of life, to be happy, within himself when he made connection with The Source. In that connection he knew he was loved. Now, again, he thought he was set.

It was if his character had been colored in or filled in like a full-bodied cartoon person would be. He felt whole, complete. But his world lost all its color. His friends, family, job, and even possessions “looked” as if they had just become stick figures. What was wrong now, he wondered.

One day a friend needed help. The man reached out because of the happiness he felt inside and helped his friend. “Suddenly,” his friend was “filled-in.” The friend no longer appeared as the cartoon character he was before he was helped. The friend was fully-filled-out person.

This gave the man an idea. What if he, because of his inner happiness, did kind things for all he encountered? Not just humans and animals, but kind things “for” his job, his possessions? He discovered he felt even better when he used that inner power to encourage or enlarge others.

The idea gelled within his thinking: happiness is not just an inner thing. The meaning of life, to be happy, is also something that exists in action. Action itself is not happiness. But happiness without action, beaming your bliss into the world, is not a complete picture. To be fully realized, the meaning of life, to be happy, propels effort in the world. Happiness is not all heart, hand must be involved as well.

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