The Meaning of Life with Dr. Bob

A basic tenet of the meaning of life is to take care of yourself first. Yet this is one the hardest tasks people have to do in finding how to be happy in their own lives.

This is the deal when the flight attendant explains that if and when the oxygen masks drop from the plane’s ceiling, in the event of an emergency, parents are to put the masks on themselves first. Then put the masks on their child or children.

I was trained from an early age that everyone else came before I did. This was taught in my home where it was said often, “You are not the center of the world. Everything does revolve around you.” I was schooled in this idea in the churches I attended. (Forced to attend, by the way. Not a good idea.) The churches said that I must not think of myself, but always of others.

It was only when I began to understand that I was not whole, that I began to question this idea. And, of course, if I were to express any sentiment like this to my peers, I would be considered arrogant or conceited. That word “conceited” flew around high school as if it were a flock of very hungry pigeons.

This idea was deeply ingrained in me. As if it were mercury or lead poisoning – literally in the tissues of my mind and self.

But the ideas I was reading about self-care were correct, I found. If I wore myself out caring for others, as I was encouraged to do in my profession, soon I’d be totally ineffective because I would have no energy or compassion left. I would have expended it all on others. The when the next person came who needed compassion or counseling, there was nothing within me.

The only way I found to get over this was to accept a new belief within myself. I am not saying it was throwing a light switch and there was suddenly light in the room. I am saying that over time, I gradually convinced myself that If I didn’t take care of myself, I couldn’t take care of others. It was literally true. I reprogrammed my Self to believe that I did come first. This does not mean a became a strutting fool. It means I got the sleep I needed. I got the exercise I needed. I got the spiritual uplift I needed. When I needed these things. I began taking vacations and days off on a regular and consistent basis.

That’s what you’ve got to do with you. To be happy, to find the meaning of life, you have take the time and energy you need for yourself. You have to change your belief system. You do need to put yourself first when you want to be happy.  If you neglect you, you will not take the time to meditate, for example. You need to take the time to find your connection with The Source of All That Is.

When you do this take-time-for-yourself thing, you will then be closer to happiness. When you are closer to happiness, the meaning of life, you will be more effective in everything you do and say ans think. Including relating to other people who believe they need you.

Take time for yourself beginning in this moment. It is part of the meaning of life, to be happy.

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